`repeat and record \reality.

2007-06-06T10:08:00.000-07:00

Hello! it's been super ultra duper long since i last blogged. Things have been pretty great so far! Work in airforceschool's library has been a breeze. Lots of slacking, playing psp, sleeping, joking, and not forgetting chionging to bind hundreds of copies of notes, punch holes like there's no tomorrow, fighting to meet a ridiculous deadline, yelling at the top of my voice during stocktaking.

My journey working in the library has been great and rewarding. I made many friends, some of whom i can call 'brothers', and some who have definitely changed my perspective of life, in some way or another. Sometimes you only know how fortunate you are when you meet someone with a less fortunate background. Makes you wonder about all the times you bully, or take advantage of. Those poor kids. Also, through one of my 'bros', i see the strength of the human spirit. The cheerfulness, optimism, innocence, kindness, genuity, friendship and so much more. He is an inspiration to me. He taught me to better appreciate life, my life. To all you bros, I thank you. Thanks for all the happy times, jokes, laughter, fights, assholeness, grossness, friendship.

In exactly one week from now, i'll be enlisting in b.m.t. I'm gonna miss you all, especially my baby, and it's gonna be at least 2 weeks before i can see you again! And between now and then, till i see you again, i'll be loving you. Love me.

14th june, B.M.T

What's going to happen when i'm in b.m.t, and when i'm out of it? I can't help but wonder if u'll be there waiting for me running into my arms or walking away from me. What if sometimes, i have a choice to be there for you but i just didn't know? Will you turn away from me again? What's going to happen in the long run if this keeps happening.

Just some questions running through my mind. I wish I had definite answers. I'm sorry.

2007-01-02T10:09:00.000-08:00

2007

WOW, WOW, WOW! It's been such a long time since i last blogged. Anyway! HAPPY NEW YEAR 2007 EVERYONE!!! Very happy to have spent this wonderful with little baby Les! MEK MEK!! HAHAHA DAMMIT ok sorry. Anyways, it's 2007 and it's time to set new resolutions for the year.

For me, I want to finish things that I started out doing, specifically gymming and taking a motorcycle license. HAHA. And also hopefully to excel in NS! Well to all of you out there, studying hard, working hard. Persevere and be determined! And know that at the end of the day it's all worth it. Be optimistic! For nothing brings you down but pessimism. It's all in the head, and never too late! And i'm sure that you can do it, if only you believe.

NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE.

Well to close off year 2006, i'd say that it's been one of the most maturing and fulfilling years of my life. I met many new friends and tried many new things. HEHEHE. Like picoo-z, clubbing.. ETC, ETC ;) And BEST OF ALL, I found my love Les! Honestly, sometimes I feel words(love) alone can't express how i feel! Missing you bad, anticipating your calls and smses, excitedly looking forward to our next outing, spending time, and everything. It's really indescribable. And it's definitely getting better and better EVERY SINGLE DAY! :D I love you more and more everyday. ;)

SERIOUSLY. Thank god I found you. I love you LOADS ALWAYS. HEHEHEHEHE. OK DAMMIT SORRY!

Anyways, it's 2.30am now and I've gtg to bed. I wish you guys all the best in 2007, that you too will finish whatever you started, and finish well. Remember, YOU CAN DO IT. NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE. IMPOSSIBLE IS NOTHING. Ok sorry that kinda came from adidas but yeah it's a good quote.

There is no trying.

There is only doing, or not doing.

JUST DO IT.

(ok SORRY, i know, i know. That came from nike ;) )

2006-12-04T05:36:00.000-08:00

Sorry i screwed up again.

Love you <3

2006-11-13T10:33:00.000-08:00

Rest

"Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart; and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."—Matthew 11:28-30.

2006-11-13T09:26:00.000-08:00

When you truly love someone

Love is when I try to make you feel guilty and then feel bad when you do.
Love is when you take my crap and explain to me time and again.
Love is when I wait an hour for you.
Love is when you starve for a week to buy me something.
Love is when you bully me.
Love is when we do stupid things.
Love is when we're evil.
Love is when we never want to say goodbye.
Love is when we work hard to make things work.
Love is when we cry.
Love is when we miss each other.
Love is when we say 'Thank you' and 'Sorry' and mean it.
Love is when we forget the world.
Love is when we say nothing at all.

I truly love you. :)

2006-10-26T05:28:00.000-07:00

Ahhhhhhhh! It's been about a week since i blogged! Anyway, TGIF tomorrow! HAHAHA. And school ends at 12 for me. Well, so far school has been pretty boring, but definitely manageable! It's just the same things almost everyday. Lab sessions, tutorials, lectures. Over and over again, monotonous. But I guess that's what life is about for everyone until we retire!

Today's National Education lecture was about racial and religious harmony. Before he began..
"Today your NE lecturer's away on course, and I am standing up for him. Well, today's topic is a very difficult topic; Racial and religious harmony. As you know, we lecturers are engineers, and we don't really know how to teach about racial and religious harmony. So let's look at it and learn in the engineering point of view."
HAHAHA. Then, 10 minutes into the lecture, the noise levels gradually increased. By 30 minutes, almost everyone was talking among themselves, and it was a really funny sight because the lecturer was so enthusiastic, he pretended that everyone was listening to him. HE JUST WENT ON. HAHA!

Anyway, GOD DAMMIT !@&*^!^@## my com speakers are spoilt! And i'm playing DotA and using some lousy cushion-foam-less earphones. AHHHH. Ok then, till I find inspiration to blog again, BYE!

2006-10-18T01:04:00.000-07:00

Life

What are we here for?
Why do we get hurt?
Why do things go wrong?

Good times & bad times
Guess we will learn
Make things better
Live forever

Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to vanish inside your kiss
Everyday I love you more and more
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change winter to spring
But I love you until the end of time

Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you

And there's no mountain too high no river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather and stars may collide
But I love you until the end of time

Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day
Oh come what may, come what may
I will love you

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place

Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day.

2006-10-16T09:35:00.000-07:00

i am just a dreamer. you're the world.

SURPRISE!!! Everybody loves them. Today i just got one of the best surprises in a very long time! :D I came home, half dead and tired from tennis. And the moment i signed online, huimei IMed me and said "HEY I SAW YOUR BLOG! COOL! HAVE YOU SEEN IT?" HAHAHAHA WTH! She's asking me if i'd seen MY OWN blog. Well, i checked it out and VOILA! TOTALLY DIFFERENT. It looks damn cool doncha' think? HAHAHA. AND IT'S BLACK AND WHITE. My favorite colours! And best of all, les did it for me! I EVEN HAVE A TAGBOARD. HAHAHA! And links. AND A 411. Man, i need UPPER UPPER CAPS NOW. Haha! She's my world!

I love you :) XOXOXOXOXOXO

Ok anyway, today i'm going to blog about CHANGE. Some lecture last week and i thought i'd share it here!
Change can appear in many forms. Sometimes it is more noticeable and sometimes it is very discreet. There are many different stages that we have to go through during a period of change. I shall use Janssen's (don't ask me who he is, i don't know too! HAHA) Four-Room Apartment Model of Change to explain the different stages of change!

Contentment: We feel content and don't see the need for change. Life is good - we are centred, focused and in control. In the contentment room, we are happy with how things are. The water is calm and steady, but we don't see a cliff furthur ahead!

Denial: Most people's first reaction to change is to go into the "denial" room, where we act as if everything's okay when at a deeper level, a little voice nags us that things are a mess. We stay here because we don't know or don't want to get out. However if we do acknowledge the change, we become passive recipients of the change. Imagine being the only person using a typewriter in a room full of computers.

For most of us, sooner or later, we will acknowledge the information, feelings and advice around us, and we become convinced that the change before us is real, significant and requires an intelligent response. Then we move on from the Denial room into... confusion.

Confusion: When you're in the Confusion room, you're neither here not there. The old way is unravelled, the new way unclear. A new leadership at the top - what do we keep doing and what do we change? A new structuring of client or project assignments - what do we do with the requests from our old clients or projects and how do we get started with the new? Living in this room means living with uncertainty. Ambiguity, suspicion, rumours and flights of imagination fill in gaps of scattered information.

We can languish in the Confusion Room and endure a daily grind of busywork that appears poorly connected to our goals. However, slowly but surely, the information starts to trickle in and a new picture begins to form. At this point we pick up speed out of the Confusion room to the last of the transitional rooms: Renewal.

Renewal: This is a heady place, a place with many possibilities to best bring about a solution or outcome to the change. Make it through renewal and we're back where we started, in Contentment, at least with that change. Give it time, though - a new leader, or technology, or some other change is probably just around the corner.

So you see, everybody undergoes change, some people go into denial, and then they become confused and finally they become contented all over again! Sometimes we hate change. But, it happens and sometimes we just have to acknowledge it, accept it and do the best we can about it! And sooner or later, we will find a way. Things will get better and everything's gonna be okay. :)

MOVIE SPREES AND COCKTAILS =D HAHAHA!

2006-10-15T08:29:00.000-07:00

The great pretender

Everyone, i believe, has a collection of masks that he keeps in his secret treasure box. However, this is a treasure box that one won't want to open unless he didn't have a choice. In this box there are masks of feelings and expressions; HAPPY mask, SAD mask, ANGRY mask, EXCITED mask, GUILTY mask, FRIENDLY MASK, etc.

For many, the happy mask is the scariest and ugliest mask one would want to touch! Reason being it's the hardest to wear on. It's got many holes that show how you look on the inside. And you constantly have to patch these holes or people can just see through! And when they do, they start poking more holes and then you have to patch the holes faster and faster or eventually your mask will disappear. Some people are more talented in patching the holes, but i think deep down inside they are the saddest people. Because they have to spend their entire life patching the holes, they never get to feel happiness without the help of the happy mask! Thank god i suck at patching holes! :D

I think the angry mask is the nicest and funnest mask to wear on. Although it, too, like the happy mask, has alot of holes and can easily be seen through, it reveals a very happy face underneath! And when it's seen through, it brings laughter and joy! And smacks on my head. (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE) Haha!

The last mask i will talk about is the Friendly/Unfriendly mask. Sometimes, situations force us to wear either of these masks to avoid trouble. Sometimes we have to appear friendly, or we might get mistaken for being arrogant and proud. And sometimes, we appear unfriendly, so that people won't get the impression that we're attracting attention.

I hope that there will come a day where everyone threw their masks away.

Ps. I'm really happy that you never wear your masks around me. :)

2006-10-14T11:53:00.000-07:00

Ahhh finally! Keeping up with times. Blogging has definately not been something that i'd do. Diaries, journals, i never had one. Nonetheless, there're times when i feel like i have to talk to someTHING, or thoughts that i really feel many others can connect to! As for why i chose 'early-christmas' for my blog's name, it has everything to do with Les! QUICK GO BOTHER HER. Hahaha! It's a name that would always remind me of her. She's my early christmas! Just like.. how the stuffed bears are hers. HAHAHA! She's magic! :)

Ok anyway! For a start, i'm going to blog about TIME! I got this inspiration from one of Les's random questions. "If you could have one special power what would it be?" At first I said that I'd want to be able to control people's minds. But NOOOOOOOOOOO!! She says it's EVIL. HAHAHA! So, i had no choice but to change what power i wished i could have. To control time! :D

Everybody wishes to control time. Unfortunately, that is impossible. And if that ever happens, then everybody would be pretty screwed. Imagine waking up and falling asleep; finding mud on yourself after you've just showered; suddenly feeling hungry; wake up with grey hair, black hair, no hair; suddenly find yourself crawling and suckling on a pacifier! Every single moment would be totally random and unpredictable, and ever-changing. One moment you're carrying your baby, the next you're studying, and so on. Thank god WE can't control time. But i sure hope I can! Haha!

Some people want time to stop. Some people want to go back in time. Some want time to fast-forward. Some want all of the above. For me, I find myself constantly hoping that time would fast-forward. But not too much. Just enough for the bus to appear, reach at my destination, receive a call, an sms, go out on an outing, earn cash, buy stuff, have a cute little baby son to play with!

Then again, there are times when I just hope time would reverse. To be back in primary school, to kick ass at marble, to play tissue fights in secondary school, to DotA 24/7/4/12/1, to "triple-kill!" :P (HAHAHA), to not have to think or worry or do anything I don't feel like doing!

Sadly, we all know that we can never ever control time.